one wordstormy summer night and we heard the thunder earlier, then when the rain came, it was sudden, thunder on the aluminium tile roof, so loud i barely heard my feet running over the rattly floor to my bedroom, i barely heard the squeak of the metal frame as I grabbed the louvre pane and pushed it shut. i should have used the handle, the glass pane snapped and i stopped and stared at the blood pumping in spurts from the tip of my finger, the rain suddenly seemed silent and i could hear that blood pumping above everything else...pain?

oneword.: free: "what is free? It just takes the right attitude and there is so much that is free, you, the air you breathe, the smile you give to someone you don't know..just because "

oneword.: drove: "last saturday I drove west, the roads i take now are not the roads that used to lead me home and i didn't make it all the way but the air out there still feels the same and the books in the cupboards still smell just like they always have "

oneword.: theme: "My theme today is quiet. I turn the music off and I listen to the wind in the tops of the trees. I listen to the birds out there and in the distance the soft hum of the cars down on the main road. When I answer the phone my voice is soft and I feel a little lost in time as if the world has slowed down. It is so quiet."

oneword.: influence: "I remember coughing up blood that morning and went I went outside there you were, tucking into your first beer of the day, at 8am. I laughed at you then and I look back now and wonder did my amusement influence you in any way? Did the fact that we all thought alcohol abuse was funny then steer you in the direction you took? I can't ask you now just like I can't ask you if you still drink or what jail was really like. "

oneword.: frosting: "We called it the 'red cupboard' and it was cosy there, with the mixmaster and the good china in the sloped dimple sliding glass overhead cupboards. The laminex was red with silver metal strips around the edge. Grandma would mix the frosting and I would stand on the chipped white stool, and wait. "

oneword.: apparent: "it was apparent from the beginning, we tried to ignore it i think, we cringed when people made jokes and it did hurt, because no matter how much you try it is still never easy to accept that someone you love is a bit different and you still wonder if maybe, just maybe it is your fault? "

oneword.: speck: "just a speck on the horizon, i turned my head and watched you shrink in the back window of the taxi that day. i have never seen you again, you in your khaki duffle coat and doc martins, your hands thrust deep into your pockets, you stood there shrinking while your kisses were still hot on my body. "

oneword.: slip: "and again i slip, slowly, quietly..the mire is deep this time, like muck in the bulls yard, the stench overtakes me and it is only that which stop me from letting it take me when i tell them, they pretend they do not hear me, they keep talking amongst themselves "

oneword.: outside: "It is raining, the water stripes the glass in my office blurring the world and making me want to blink until the sun shines again. Or making me want to climb into bed, naked and warm and not alone. Outside it is raining. "

oneword.: pendant: "We bought them at the show, the three of us. My two boys and me. I can't remember what theirs were like but mine was a metal heart with my name engraved on it. Paul's chain got tangled once and I fixed it for him. Philip was jealous. "

oneword.: stitch: "She was friends with my Grandma. She would come to school each friday afternoon with reels of cotton and sharp little needles. I sat there swinging my legs and it didn't matter how much I tried may hands were too young to stich a neat line. The others would whisper, turn and snicker. "

oneword.: office: "It is cool in here, so I take breaks from daily chores and try to work but my heart isn't in it. My heart infact seems to be missing altogether. Instead I have a huge empty hole filled with hot air, I guess with that I should be doubly glad that the office is air conditioned. "

oneword.: string: "My grandmother told me to tie the piece of string around my finger and then she was sure I would not forget, but when I saw that string there, later in the day, all I could remember was that I was supposed to remember something but what? "

oneword.: incredible: "It was an incredible feeling, I remember thinking that there was no way I could really deserve something like that. Me? So we sat out there on that concrete porch until the wee hours , and for once, my life was perfect. "

oneword.: fuel: "The first time in the gas station my hands shook and I was so self-conscious not to let the fuel spill down the car. It all went perfectly until I drove away with my sunglasses on the roof. "

oneword.: hit: "It is like being hit, the look she gives me, I see her calculating the power of it, throwing at at me with the knowledge that she is striking a blow hard enough to wind me."

oneword.: footage: "I can't see this word and not think of what we have seen in the last few weeks, the utter devastation, the complete horror and the raw heart breaking grief. I can only wish love and peace and plenty on those poor tsunami affected people. "

oneword.: worth: "is that all it is, a perception of self-worth? is that the one thing that can control each and every person's destiny? i thought we were all worth more than that."